I Did The Splits...Literally

"Liz", "funny", "lifestyle", "stories"Liz LuscombComment

I just wanted to tell everyone that I did the splits first thing in the morning.

Yep.  At 31 years of age, I did the splits.  

Feeling a bit nostalgic that morning, I slid my battered duck slippers onto my very cold feet.

From there, I cruised through the house, completing my usual routine; brush teeth, pull back hair, begrudgingly walk down the stairs, rubbing my eyes, wishing I was asleep in my warm bed.

Making it downstairs safely, I opened the baby gate, and took one step onto the lament hardwood floor.

This very ordinary motion prompted my slipper to react with my floor as if it were freshly mopped in oil.

Without any time for my morning brain to react properly, my foot slid straight out in front of me without warning.

I was also juuuuust barely out of reach from the table to grab hold of in order to catch my inevitable fall from grace.
Then it happened...

Down she went... my 31 year old-out-of-shape-body.
Landing into the splits, with duck slippers on my feet.

Then I hear, "It's a TEN!"

Not really.  But it would have been funny if someone did shout that.  

What lesson did I learn?

I now understand the importance of stretching.  I also now know that you can skip caffeine because doing the splits will make you feel wide awake!

Ouch.  Now excuse me while I go stretch.

Oh...and just in case you were wondering,  I no longer own those slippers.